Navigating Tragedy: Tools and Resources for Families and Communities in the Wake of School Shootings
In the aftermath of a school shooting, the shock, grief, and anxiety can feel overwhelming and the unraveling of information sends ripples far beyond the affected campus. Families, students, educators, and entire communities find themselves grappling with emotions they’ve never experienced before. We understand that during these moments, many people may not feel ready to leave their homes or seek in-person support. That’s why we’ve compiled accessible tools and resources to help families and communities begin the healing process from the comfort of their homes.
Emotional Regulation and Grounding Tools
Grief and anxiety can often feel all-encompassing. These strategies can provide small moments of relief:
Box Breathing Technique: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, and pause for 4 seconds. Repeat this process to regulate your body’s stress response.
Grounding Exercise (5-4-3-2-1): Identify 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste. This helps bring focus to the present moment.
Journaling Prompts: Write about a memory that brings you comfort, what you’re feeling right now, or something you’re grateful for.
Accessible Mental Health Resources
National Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a trained crisis professional 24/7.
Suicide & Crisis Text Line: Text or call 988 24/7. Multilingual.
The Disaster Distress Helpline: Call or text 1-800-985-5990 for immediate support in the aftermath of a traumatic event. Multilingual.
Calm or Headspace Apps: Offers guided meditations and mindfulness exercises. A free version is available with many helpful tools.
Therapy Assistance Online (TAO): A platform that offers online self-help modules for mental health challenges. www.taoconnect.org
Supporting Children at Home
Maintain Structure: Routine provides comfort during uncertainty. Simple daily schedules, like consistent mealtimes and bedtimes, can help children feel secure and provide a sense of normalcy.
Validate Emotions: Experiencing or witnessing a school shooting is life-altering. It’s essential to recognize that your emotions—whether fear, anger, sadness, or confusion—are valid. Open communication within the family can help normalize these feelings. Acknowledge your child’s feelings with statements like, “It’s okay to feel scared. Let’s talk about it when you’re ready.”
Create a Safe Space for Expression: Art, journaling, music, or even quiet moments of reflection can provide an outlet for complex emotions. Encourage your child to express themselves in ways that feel natural to them.
Books and Media for Kids:
“When Something Terrible Happens” by Marge Heegaard (for younger children).
“The Invisible String” by Patrice Karst, a comforting story about staying connected even when apart.
Community and Connection Tools
Foster a Sense of Belonging: Community gatherings, vigils, or support groups create spaces for connection. Feeling part of a caring community can be a powerful source of healing.
Online Support Groups:
Parents of Murdered Children (POMC) offers virtual resources and support groups for families.
The Compassionate Friends: Support for those grieving the loss of a child or sibling.
Social Media Communities: Private Facebook groups can provide a space to connect with others experiencing similar grief.
Acts of Kindness: When ready, small acts like writing a letter of support to affected families or creating a tribute in your home can foster a sense of connection.
Madison Wisconsin Resources: https://www.cityofmadison.com/mayor/programs/resources
Safety Planning
For those feeling heightened anxiety about returning to schools or public spaces:
Reassure Preparedness: Work with your child’s school to understand safety protocols.
Practice “What If” Scenarios: Go over plans calmly to help everyone feel more prepared.
Emergency Contacts: Ensure your child knows how to contact family members or trusted adults in case of an emergency.
Promote Safety and Security Measures: Engage in open dialogue with local law enforcement and school administrators to address safety concerns. While no one can guarantee absolute safety, taking action can rebuild trust in the community.
Prioritize Mental Health Resources: Ensure access to counselors, crisis intervention teams, and support groups within schools and community centers. Proactively sharing these resources can make a world of difference.
6. Mental Health Toolkits
Downloadable resources you can use today:
Mindfulness Exercises for Families - Mindful.org
Self-Care for Caregivers
As caregivers, it’s important to tend to your own emotional health:
Create a Calm Space: Dedicate a room or corner in your home for quiet reflection.
Limit News Consumption: Stay informed but set boundaries around how much media you consume to avoid overwhelm.
Engage in Simple Joys: Take a walk, prepare a favorite meal, or call a friend.
Call to Action: Together, We Can Heal
Tragedies like school shootings affect us all, and healing requires a collective effort. We encourage community members to check in on one another, lend a helping hand, or simply listen when someone needs to talk.
If you or your family need more personalized support, Heart Line Counseling is here to help. Contact us at 608-377-3864 or email info@heartlinecc.com to connect with one of our compassionate counselors. We would be honored to support you, when you’re ready.